The Tale of Two Houses

Have you ever walked into a home and been at total peace? What about that house made you at peace? Maybe it was that there wasn't any clutter, or there was an inviting smell, or the people who welcomed you in instantly put you at ease? What about that house made you pause and breath?

Have you ever walked in a home at made you ill-at ease? What was it that caused tension? Noise? Smell? Clutter? Confusion?

Imagine with me for a moment two houses side by side. This time our focus isn't so much on what the homes look like, but on what it's inhabitants experience. 

Those who live in one home experience tension, confusion, guilt, shame, addiction, pain, a lack of love and peace, violence, and death. There is a range of depths that the inhabitants experience these things. It could be that they experience mild tension and confusion and violence, all the way to a deeply intense tension, confusion, and violence. Ultimately though, they are experienced. 

The other home is quite different. The second home is one of order, peace, love, affection, fulfillment, clarity, lightness, completeness, joy, calmness, understanding, freedom, and life. I love gardens, and I imagine that this home has a beautiful indoor greenhouse with a little stream, lots of green things, and most wonderful smells. In this home the inhabitants are free to leave, but have no desire to do so.

I know which home I want to live in!!! There's just no question. Not even a moment's hesitation. Seriously. I was reading in the Bible this morning, in Romans, about slavery. Slavery isn't a physical thing I experience, or have ever experienced. According to things I've read still exists today for millions around the world (and I can hardly bear the thought and fall on my knees every time I hear about it). But it isn't something I've experienced, physically. But that isn't what Paul was referring to. He was referring to a spiritual condition. Paul says that we are slaves, either to sin, or to righteousness. We are slaves to God, or to ourselves, and by default to our mortal enemy (Romans 6-7).  When we allow sin to rule in us, to be our slave master, the natural consequences are living in the first home I described. Tension, confusion, guilt, shame, etc. We experience the torment of a slave master with no mercy, no grace. We get beaten down, and are a slave to our own lusts. We can experience this even though we have confessed Christ as Lord. Pause and reflect on a time you've experienced this.

On the other hand, those who's slave master is Christ the Lord experience quite the opposite. I've not known a gentler, kinder, more patient master. who's love knows no end. Those who work and serve in His house are free to leave at any time and experience everything described in the second house, even in the midst of the most trying circumstances. Yet those who truly are His, would never dream of leaving. They experience a life that not many find. Life, love, fulfillment to a depth many only dream of. 

Christy Nockels wrote a song and I love the picture it gives:

So, how does one move from one house to the other? Faith. Belief. Belief in Jesus. Seek Jesus. He says, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me." (John 14:6)

Jesus tells us through the prophet Jeremiah, "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart." (Jeremiah 29:13)

Jesus says, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." (John 8:12)

Jesus tells us through Paul, "For He has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and transferred us into the Kingdom of the Son He loves." (Colossians 1:13)

Kingdom. Gods's Kingdom. His house is a house of great peace, deep joy, and overwhelming love.

The tale of two houses, two kingdoms. Where are you living? In which home are you serving? Which master are you serving? 

Here is a beautiful post giving context to some of the Bible's passages about being bond slave.

God's Ways Are NOT My Ways: Psalm 42:11

"Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me? 

Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise Him, my Savior and my God." 

Psalm 42:11 NIV

In the book of John, Jesus tells us we will have trouble in this world. It's a guarantee. On any given day we could probably be able to name several troubles in our own lives, and troubles we see happening around the world. Without even researching, I can say with certainty that the troubles in our world are increasing in intensity and visibility as we get closer to "go time." "Go time" = heaven is coming!! This thought also comes from the Bible. Yet in Psalms, David reminds us (and God does too), that we can put our hope in God, and even praise Him, in the midst of troubles.

Last night I found soul downcast and disturbed. In the same breath, I can't help but say that I had a beautiful day yesterday that was full of blessing, and I wanted for nothing. Yet, as predicted by the Savior, I had troubles. As I went to bed I found myself reacting passive aggressively, and aggressively, to my circumstances. This morning I had clarity about what went down, and was able to see with better perspective how I want to react in the future. I want to be able to react with understanding and JOY. JOY is one of those words that even though we can look it up in the dictionary and quote a definition, it's a word that describes a spiritual thing that will be a little bit elusive until we reach heaven. To fully understand the depth of that word, and be able to fully express with words what it means, is a little bit impossible. BUT, I know that if I find joy in anything other than the Lord, it will be a short-lived emotion! However, my desire is to be filled with Holy-Spirit Joy in the evening. This is infringing on a generational sin! Not only that, but to suggest that it is possible to have JOY past 8pm, God will have to break a law of (my) nature. I'm a tried and true morning person, and my father's daughter. After the dinner dishes are done, I'm toast, ready for bed. To have to do any kind of chores, ready books at any length, be social, is quite difficult for me. YET, I know Jesus was raised from the dead, and so certainly God, if given the opportunity, can fill me with JOY after 8pm. The Lord is gracious and I am been an active participant in JOY in the evening, and I will fight for it to be a regular occurrence.

"Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise Him, my Savior and my God." So, putting faith into action, I'm going to be asking the Lord for help in redeeming my 8-11pm part of my life and filling it with JOY. I have every HOPE that it will be accomplished, because I can put my HOPE in the living God. His promises are as good as done. It will take some active participation on my part, and is my new learning target.

I can become an active participant in being filled with JOY in the evening, no matter the circumstances.

Walking by faith,
Becky

God's Ways Are NOT My Ways: 1 Corinthians 13

1 Corinthians 13:1-8a. NIV
"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."

I've been studying in John recently, and struck by Jesus' words in chapter 6. He claims that He is the bread of life, and that anyone who believes in Him, and comes to Him, will not be be turned away, and will have life. I've experienced this in the desperate times (take that with a grain of salt...we live a very comfortable life), and the times that are not as desperate.  When I come to the Lord who is nearer than a breath, He breathes life to my soul with scripture, with song. I'm reminded of how Aslan breaths life into the cold, lifeless animals in the White Witch's fortress in the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. As I read His word and talked with Him this morning, He revived my soul and brought new perspective.

I came to Him this morning from within a deep rut. I recognized the place instantly, and thankfully recognized that there were hand holds and foot holds, and then the hand of Jesus reached down and I was able to easily step out of the rut. In the past I haven't seen it as such, and the way of escape hasn't always been so easily visible. Of course, in the past I've set up house in the rut and maybe enjoyed being there for a time. Goodness. But this morning was different.

John 6:45 "It is written in the Prophets: 'They will all be taught by God.' Everyone who listens to the Father and learns from Him comes to me."

I sat down with a cup of coffee in the silence of the morning, and even as I spoke my heart to the Father, He directed my mind to the passage in 1 Corinthians, "love is patient." It stilled my heart. As I went to grab my Bible I looked around me. I saw evidence of my family's life. Toys, laundry, books, school books, papers to grade, and grad school application documents. It reminded me that I am just a part of something bigger that was going on around me, and the fact that the needs I have are just some of the many ongoing needs of my family. They will be met, and met best in the loving, life-giving, words of Jesus.

He proclaims, "My love is patient, my love is kind." I was reminded of the times when I've experienced God's patient forgiveness and kindness and my heart softened and was reminded to trust God with my needs. In addition to that, I was reminded that my love for my family is best displayed in patience and kindness. The title of this post speaks of the difference between the ways of God and the ways man. My way is to be self-centered, short-sighted, and self-serving. God's ways are patient, kind, others focused, and everything else we see in the 1 Corinthians passage. God's definition of love in this passage is something He has already lived out time and time again. We see it on display from the very beginning of Genesis, all the way to the very end of Revelation. The magnitude of His fulfillment of this passage is beyond what I, or anyone else, can imagine. This puts my sighings to bed, and with this new perspective I continue on in my day with great HOPE that any need I have is met in the perfect love of God and His Son, Jesus.

I have been subbing for a month now, and everywhere I go I see learning targets. Here are today's learning targets:

I can trust God to meet my every need because His love for me is patient, kind, and on display in an infinite amount of ways.
I can show love that is patient and kind, no matter what the circumstances because it is inspired by the love God has for me.

Adventure 2015-Part 1

Before heading off on the Adventure

This summer our family had the pleasure of planning, and then going on, an adventure. It isn't the first we've gone on, and Lord willing it won't be our last. My husband loves adventures. He's been fulfilling his love of adventuring for years, and it gives him such pleasure to now be taking his family. As his family, the boys and I love experiencing all that he plans. The adventures we've been on thus far have been very planned out and prayed over. Food, shelter, and safety are all the things that he considers, and thus far he's done an amazing job at planning down to the last detail, and the adventure is amazing because of his thoughtfulness. This adventure was no different. Certainly it was more challenging because of the length, as well as what he'd planned for us during this adventure.

The plan for this one was to go to hike in to Duffy Lake and set up base camp. Base camp included the Tajmatent, a kitchen, a laundry line, a food line (to make sure we didn't get crittered), and a fishing gear station. The day after we hiked in the plan was to bushwack to the Pacific Coast Trail at the base of Three-Fingered Jack, climb up and down the mountain, bushwack down to Santiam lake to water up, and then find and hike the train back to Duffy Lake. The next day the plan was to chill by Duffy, fish, and rest our sore and tired muscles, and then the following day to hike out and meet up with grandparents at Black Butte. The plan. The master plan. It took much planning to work out sleep, food, safety, and then stuff like a rubber raft, climbing gear...and put it into four packs while the while being reasonable weight wise. I mean, the youngest is 6 1/2 for pete's sake. He's not a little guy for 6 1/2, but he's not hercules (although I'm pretty sure he think's he is).

Before heading off on our adventure this summer, we had some clear ideas of what we wanted to accomplish. We'd never done this long of a trip before, and we certainly had never climbed a mountain. 

Base Camp

Before we even begun to pack, before we walked out the front door, before we left our car and headed off into the woods, we could have decided that this wasn't what we wanted to do. We could have decided that the things we'd planned were too difficult, or that it wasn't worth the hardship. What we gained from the experience was absolutely priceless, and the views we saw were worth any hardship. One of the lessons I learned from this experience is that I always have a choice to take a challenge or not, and I will always gain wisdom and experience from the challenge, or not. I could have said, "No. I don't think I want to go." I would have not known the difference, but I would have missed so much. There is so much in life that is challenging, but unless we say yes to all that the hardship means, we won't take from it what God has planned for us.

The picture below was taken the morning after we arrived. I walked down to the lake to pump water for the day's adventure, and this beautiful sight met me. This lake is always here. It is always declaring the glory of the Lord. I'm so thankful to have said yes to this adventure so I could partake of this glory. I wonder how many times I've said no to something the Lord would have me do, something hard, and I've missed seeing Him work? I wonder how many times I've missed seeing His glory? I want the answer on my lips to be yes. I want to not shrink back from the hard, but to seek out God's glory in the midst of it. I want the hard to draw me closer to Him, to lean on His mighty strength, and to experience Him at work in me. His thoughts and ways are so much higher than mine (Isaiah 55), and His ways are always for my good (Romans 8). Even the hard ones. I'm so thankful for this adventure and the way it stretched me and our family. We are closer and stronger for it. And we climbed a mountain. It takes my breath away every time I think about it. More about that later...

Early Morning Fog on Duffy Lake

Words: Jesus' inviting words

John 1:35-39

"The next day John was there again with two of his disciples. When he saw Jesus passing by, he said, 'Look, the lamb of God!' 

When the two disciples heard him say this, they followed Jesus. Turning around, Jesus saw them following and asked, 'What do you want?' 

They said, 'Rabbi' (which means Teacher), 'Where are you staying?' 'Come,' he replied, 'and you will see.'" 

First, a declaration by John the Baptist. John, who was filled with the Holy Spirit, carrying out the good works God had prepared for him to do (Eph 2). John who spent his days declaring that the kingdom of God was near, and that the Messiah would soon enter on to the scene. His life was a pouring out of himself as he lifted high the name of God, as he lifted high and exalted the kingdom of God in the face of religious hypocrite, and in the face of those who were sheep without a shepherd. The heavenly anger, and compassion, he must have felt. And to declare..."Look! The lamb of God!" The Messiah! Jesus! His disciples went. They left John. They went to follow, to seek. They declared intention as they asked where he was staying. Jesus simply replied, "Come." This simple conversation. These simple words. This is where it is at.

"Jesus! Where are you? Where are you going? What are you doing?" These are simple questions. Sometimes we seek because we are hungry and thirsty for more than this life has to offer. Sometimes we ask because we are hurt and we want more. Sometimes we ask because we are motivated out of love and we want to walk in obedience.

Sometimes we ask and then we stop listening. Sometimes we ask and we don't like what we hear.

Jesus always responds..."Come, and you will see." He gets our attention. He asks us to continue listening. He invites us to join Him. So, are you listening as someone standing on the outside of the crowd? Are you listening for the moments that interest you? Are you listening and not participating? Or are you listening intently at His feet, with your shoes on, ready to move when He moves? These words are simple, and invite us to come along.

Transition: Would you like some clear words of direction?

Joshua 22:1-
"Then Joshua summoned the Reubenites, the Gadites and the half-tribe of Manaseh and said to them, 'You have done all that Moses the servant of the Lord commanded and you have obeyed me in everything I commanded. For a long time now–to this very day–you have no deserted your brothers but have carried out the mission the Lord your God gave you. Now that the Lord your God has given your brothers rest as He promised, return to your homes in the land that Moses the servant of the Lord gave you on the other side of the Jordan. But be very careful to keep the amendment and the law that Moses the servant of the Lord gave you; to love the Lord your God, to walk in all His ways, to obey His commands, to hold fast to Him and to serve Him with all your heart and all your soul.'

Over the last two weeks I've been reading through Joshua. There are parts of this book that I want to turn my head and look away, and there are parts I jump up and down for and cheer! My understanding of God and the way He works is made clearer every time I read Joshua. My understanding of what it looks like when a servant-leader responds to God, even if the directions are strange or uncomfortable. My own desire and resolve to be obedient, and to listen to the Lord of Hosts (all the way to the end), becomes stronger every time I read this. My faith becomes greater; a faith authored and perfected by Jesus (Heb 12), after all, these accounts were orchestrated by God Himself!

I may go back and write about the beginning of the book, but here I am with about 10 minutes before kiddos wake from naps, and this passage (Joshua 22) spoke to me this morning.

TRANSITION

At one point or another, we've encountered this thing. Sometimes it's of our own choosing, sometimes it isn't. There have been two times in the last year and a half when I've encountered this, and those times were highly uncomfortable. I am comfortable when I have understanding and control over my life. I like routine. These things were taken out of my hands. Looking back they were times where I recognize that God patiently waited while I ran in circles briefly, noticed what I was doing, settled before Him... and then we continued on. As I read this passage I noticed that these people, a portion of the tribes of Israel, were in a time of transition. They had spent the last 5 years in obedience to what they'd been called to do, and they were about to be released from that duty. Joshua's words to them spoke to me and gave me insight for the next time I'm in transition. Please take time to read and study this on your own, and take time to soak in what God would have you learn and apply. Here is what ministered to me.

1) Joshua called together these 2 1/2 tribes and began by encouraging them. "You have done all that Moses the servant of the Lord commanded and you have obeyed me in everything I commanded. For a long time now–to this very day–you have not deserted your brothers but have carried out the mission the Lord your God gave you." There have been times when as I'm going through transition, I wonder if there is some reason I'm being called to something different. I wonder at times if I've not fulfilled my duties, or if it's because of disobedience. This does encourage me to ask the Lord, "Have I been faithful? Have I fulfilled the mission you've given me?" I could even ask this of my husband, or those who are close to me. God wanted these tribes to know that they had been obedient, and that they were released from their duties. If you are in a transition that is not of your choosing, and you are wondering about this, I encourage you to settle this in your heart by speaking with God about this, or with those who love and care about you.

2) "Now that the Lord your God has given your brothers rest as He promised, return to your homes in the land that Moses the servant of the Lord gave you on the other side of the Jordan." In this passage God is proclaimed as a promise-keeper. So many other places in the Bible also prove that God fulfills His promise. In addition, very specific directions are given to these tribes. Not always are we given directions like this, which is a fulfillment of a promise given by Moses. Sometimes we are asked to wait patiently for just the next step. In those times, the next direction is all we need. During transition times, there will be times when things are unclear. During these times Phil 4:6-7, Prov 3:5-6, are verses that have been lifelines to remind me not to worry, but to remember that if it really is God who directs my steps, what have I to be anxious about! God is a promise-keeper.

3) "But be very careful to keep the commandment and the law that Moses the servant of the Lord gave you; to love the Lord your God, to walk in all His ways, to obey His commands, to hold fast to Him and to serve Him with all your heart and all your soul." For those times when I am hanging on for the next step...just waiting for time to pass until there is a next step revealed, these commands are so clear, so life giving, give hope, and are really all we need. Love God. Be obedient. Obey His commands. Hold fast to Him with. all. your. heart. and. all. your. soul. The end. Do we need anything else? For those moments when I just want to KNOW THE FUTURE, and I'm spinning with questions. Love God. Hold fast to Him. Just obey. Praise the Lord for clear directions like these. Transitions are just that...transitions. They don't last. But sometimes they are so dang hard.

I'd love to hear what transition was hard for you, what scripture God used to help you get through, and if any of these words from Joshua 22 resonate with you! Consider commenting below.

Words: Joshua

Joshua 1:1-11

"After the death of Moses the servant of the Lord, the Lord said to Joshua son of Nun, Moses' aide: Moses my servant is dead. Now then, you and all these people, get ready to cross the Jordan River into the land I am about to give to them–to the Israelites. I will give you every place where you set your foot, as I promised Moses. Your territory will extend from the desert to Lebanon, and from the great river, the Euphrates–all the Hittite country–to the Great Sea on the west. No one will be able to stand up against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you; I will never leave you nor forsake you. Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their forefathers to give them. Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you, do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."

Moses is dead.
Get ready.
I will give you...as I promised.
No one will be able to stand against...
As I was with Moses, so I will be with you...
I will never leave you nor forsake you.
Be strong
Be courageous
...you will lead these people
Be strong and very courageous.
Be careful to obey all the law...do not turn to the right or to the left...
Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth...
meditate on it day and night...
Have I not commanded you?
Be strong and and courageous.
Do not be terrified.
Do not be discouraged.
I am with you.

Joshua had walked with Moses, talked with him, and had been witness to many incredible things. God was about to fulfill a promise spoken years and years before to Abraham, and Joshua was to lead the Israelites into the fulfillment of this promise. The task was daunting. He could have said, "I just can't." He probably was tempted to lay it all down and walk away. These words that God spoke in the ear of this leader are heavy. They are purposeful. They have life and direction, they have power and insight. These words fill my heart, mind, and spirit with courage and purpose. I fall on my knees and ask, "Lord, send me! Almighty God, I am not worthy to be called, but send me!" "Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. " Emmanuel. God with us. Almighty God, with us.

How do these words stir your heart?

Words

On my mind lately...words. The world is filled with all kinds of words. Written words, spoken words. Words that hold great value, meaning, purpose, promise; and words that are like garbage, or are like fluff that blow away and aren't worth anything, or are empty. I'm making plans to look carefully at the words uttered by the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, the God of the Bible. Just this morning I spent time looking at Genesis 17, where God initiates a covenant with Abraham. His spoken words are quoted. I believe this event took place thousands of years ago, and that by the divine hand of God those words were recorded and exist still today. I believe that the words spoken, the covenant established, was spoken by a God who does not throw around His words carelessly, but purposefully places them down in time and space with great meaning and value. I want for this part of God's character to have impact on my life. Anyone want to join the conversation? I'd love to have the thoughts of others as I launch into this study!

Psalm 119...an invitation

Psalm 119:9-16
"How can a young man keep his way pure? By living according to your word. I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands. I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you. Praise be to you, O Lord; teach me your decrees. With my lips I recount all the laws that come from your mouth. I rejoice in following your statues as one rejoices in great riches. I meditate on your precepts and consider your ways. I delight in your decrees; I will not neglect your word."

John 16:13-15
"But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come. He will bring glory to me by taking from what is mind and making it known to you. All that belongs to the Father is mine. That is why I said the Spirit will take from what is mind and make it known to you."

John 4:21-24
"Jesus declared, 'Believe me, woman, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. You Samaritans worship what you do not know; we worship what we do know, for salvation is from the Jesws. Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. God is spirit, and his worshipers much worship in spirit and in truth.'"

Psalm 119. So long. Each part has God's law, His word, His decrees, His precepts, His utterances, as the focal point. In my simple read through this morning, as I consider my Savior, My God whom I treasure, I'm reminded of what Jesus says about the Holy Spirit and truth. The psalmist talks about treasuring, delighting in, and honoring God's words. He devours them, feeds on them, they are his life line to safety, wisdom, protection, holiness. But not only that, he sees them as a conversation between himself and God. As I get to know any friend here on earth, we talk, we explain ourselves, our dreams, and as we grow in knowledge of each other we get a sense of character, and of their soul. We have understanding of each other that continues to increase.

How is it that the Creator and sustainer of the universe invites us into that kind of relationship? To grow in knowledge and understanding of His character, but more than just understanding from afar, as if I were learning of a great hero of the an earlier time, He invites to have understanding of Him as someone close, that I'm walking through life with RIGHT NOW.

Why would I spend my time anywhere else, than in His word, having a conversation with the One that made me, sustains me, who has all wisdom of the universe because HE MADE IT; who has all wisdom of me and my family, and my circumstances, because HE MADE IT ALL.

My heart and soul are refreshed when I spend time with Him, I have wisdom for each situation, I am loved, I have peace, through it all IT IS WELL.

Dancing, and Singing (in bed)

Psalm 149:3-5
"Let them praise His Name with dancing and make music to Him with tambourine and harp. For the Lord takes delight in His people; He crowns the humble with salvation. Let the saints rejoice in this honor and sing for joy on their beds."

Have you sang for joy in your bed? I've sang for joy in my bed, in the shower, as I'm running, as I've danced in my kitchen. This Psalm says to dance and make music with instruments!! It says that the Lord delights in His people. It says he crowns the humble with salvation and that the saints rejoice in this HONOR and will sing in their beds. I love singing, making music, and dancing. Like I've written and said before, worship is a total body, mind, and emotion experience...but it is more than an experience. It is an act not based on what it accomplishes for me. It is in response to the work of God in my heart and my life. My heart LEAPS when God proves His love and faithfulness to me in ways I know only He knows. My heart LEAPS for joy when I can see His work in my heart...when the selfishness leaves, the pride leaves, and instead I'm left with humble awe at the work of His hands. Have you experienced this before? When there is no fear...just trust left in its place. God, the ultimate provider! He provides so perfectly and God longs for us to fully trust His provision...to not worry or doubt Him. Matthew 6:25-33. Do we really believe, in the age of everything-at-our-finger-tips, that God is still our provider? Do we believe, in the age of grocery stores or everything-else-you'd-ever-need grocery stores? Do I still believe in God my provider? Do we seek to steward well what He's given us? Do we seek His wisdom and His kingdom first?

If I can sing for joy in my bed, if I can delight in the honor of being chosen and saved and delighted in by God, I can not be fearful or worried at the same time. Is it possible? I don't find myself experiencing those two things at the same time.

God you are perfectly holy, loving, gracious, just, righteous, merciful, and you have honored us with salvation through Jesus Christ. I praise your Holy Name and sing songs and dance before YOU today. I will sing songs of joy in my bed tonight, tomorrow, and forevermore.

Be still...really.

This morning the plan was to sleep in, work a little in the yard, go to church, and work more outside and inside. Work, work, work. About 10:30 we decided to quit and get ready for church, and then something happened that caused all of the plans to halt. No church, no more work. It's in these moments, in the past, that I've fallen apart and have had a hard time acknowledging reality. The reality was that we have been going non-stop for forever the past several weeks, and that we really needed church to be us ministering to ourselves as a family. Well, that's what happened. And it refreshed our souls and rejuvenated our bodies. Well, that's a brighter picture actually than what happened. I do think we all took a breath. I am reminded again, of Exodus 14:14. God sees the bigger picture and is at work if we will only be still. Striving to accomplish our plan, or even our interpretation of God's plan, will just cause us frustrated exhaustion. So thankful that Jesus reminds me again that His yoke is easy and His burden is light (Matthew 11:28-30). I'll take it!

How do you see God working on your behalf as you've stilled your strivings?

Surrender, Pt 2

Psalm 27:1-2
"The Lord is my light and my salvation–
whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life–
of whom shall I be afraid?"

Psalm 57:1
"Have mercy on me, O God, have mercy on me, for in your my soul takes refuge. I will take refuge in the shadow of your wings until the disaster has passed."

Psalm 87 (Beautiful Psalm speaking of God's establishment and love for Zion and the people who were born there. I think this has connections to these other Psalms, but I have too little understanding.)

Psalm 117
"Praise the Lord, all you nations; extol Him, all you peoples, for great is His love toward us, and the faithfulness of the Lord endures forever. Praise the Lord!

Psalm 147
This is a beautiful, majestic Psalm with declarations of all that God has done (God never changes, therefore, will continue to do). It begins...

"Praise the Lord. How good it is to sing praises to our God, how pleasant and fitting to praise Him!"

and it ends...

"He has revealed His word to Jacob, and His laws and decrees to Israel. He has done this for no other nation; they do not know His laws. Praise the Lord."

It has been interesting to see these Psalms, every day, come together in themes. Usually there are several themes, and usually the Lord brings one to the forefront for me. When I first read these Wednesday evening, I noticed that each one mentioned music. Until now I don't remember there being that consistently a pattern specific to music. That caught my attention and I figured I would write about music. This morning though my attention was brought to WHY we would be brought to a place of worship, and worship with music. To me, singing or playing worship music is a full body, mind, and emotion surrender to the Lord. So often I turn it on when I am feeling low or my mind or emotions are struggling. If I'm willing to acknowledge I don't have it all together, and in fact I don't have anything together, the Lord sweeps in and His throne and kingship is established in my heart once again. His truth penetrates. I think of all those Psalms which speak of the Lord having His way with my enemies. There are certainly no physical enemies, but we know that our struggle isn't against flesh and blood (Romans 8).

As I read this morning I think about what it looks like when I love the Lord with all of the heart, mind, and soul, and my neighbor as myself (the greatest commandment as declared by Jesus Himself,  Matthew 22:36-40). What does it look like to have God as my light and my salvation, and the stronghold of my life? WHAT DOES THAT LOOK LIKE?!? To me this feels like a serious culmination of, who do I place my trust in, whom do I worship, and to whom to I surrender all of myself? I acknowledge, now, out loud, that God's wisdom and thoughts are higher than anything I could conjure up in my little dust person brain (dust person...credit to Anne Graham Lotz). God is my Creator, my Savior, my Redeemer, my Healer, my Provider (there's more). He has declared this of Himself, and I declare it of Him. He has done it. I can look at each one of these Psalms and say, "Yes! God has done THESE THINGS in my life." As I have declared that my wisdom has run out in a certain situation, as I've FULLY rested in a certain circumstance, as I've simply walked one step behind Him in obedience to all the little tedious things, God has worked on my behalf. He has given wisdom, He has worked out circumstances, He has provided moments in which to declare things on my mind, He has truly shown Himself faithful to His promise to work on my behalf while I have kept still (Ex. 14:14).

In this blog I set out to simply declare the praises of God. 1 Peter 2:9, Eph 1. He has done these great things. I am simply observer, and sometimes participant, in the mighty works of God in my life and in others.

And this, this is where the praises of God will reside. It is to extol His Name, for it is a Name which is above every Name. At this Name, the Name of Jesus, every knee will bow, every tongue confess, that Jesus is Lord. (Phil 2:9-11). He is my light, my salvation, my stronghold, and my only hope. Jesus, the Lamb who was slain. He will receive my praise, my life.

Praise Jesus!

Surrender Doesn't Mean Defeat

Psalm 26:1-3
"Vindicate me, O Lord, for I have led a blameless life; I have trusted in the Lord without wavering. Test me, O Lord, and try me, examine my heart and my mind; for Your love is ever before me, and I walk continually in your truth.

Psalm 56:1-4
"Be merciful to me, O God, for men hotly pursue me; all day long they press their attack. My slanderers pursue me all day long; many are attacking me in their pride. When I am afraid, I will trust in You. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid. What can mortal man do to me?

Psalm 86:1-4 (But read the whole thing later)
"Hear, O Lord, and answer me, for I am poor and needy. Guard my life, for I am devoted to you. You are my God; save your servant who trusts in you. Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I call to you all day long. Bring joy to your servant, for to you, O Lord, I lift up my soul."

Psalm 116:1-9
"I love the Lord, for He heard my voice; He heard my cry for mercy. Because He turned His ear to me, I will call on Him as long as I live. The cords of death entangled me, the anguish of the grave came upon me; I was overcome by trouble and sorrow. Then I called on the name of the Lord: 'O Lord, save me!' The Lord is gracious and righteous; our God is full of compassion. The Lord protects the simple hearted; when I was in great need, He saved me. Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you. For You, O Lord, have delivered my soul from death, my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling, that I may walk before the Lord in the land of the living."

Psalm 146:1-3 (But PLEASE read the whole thing later)
"Praise the Lord. Praise the Lord, O my soul. I will praise the Lord all my life; I will sing praise to my God as long as I live. Do not put your trust in princes, in mortal men, who cannot save."

1 Peter 4:19
"So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good."

Today in my study of Psalms I started in chapter 26. I read that and immediately was convicted. I have not led a blameless life. No way. No one has. In the study notes (Ryrie) it says "blameless life...sincerity of purpose and single-hearted devotion, not sinlessness." Okay. Well, sincerity of purpose and single-hearted devotion is definitely something that I crave and want. I thought about the things and desires that are pulling me in all sorts of directions right now. There are several activities I'd love to devote my time to thinking and praying about and DOING, but they have to be put on the back burner because of the things in front of my face that require my time and energy. My attention has been split. My devotion has been split. Now, the verse in 1 Peter. Suffering. There is very little in my life I'd consider suffering, especially when I consider those around the world who lack for so many things, or are being persecuted. No. I'm not suffering. However, to continue doing good does take self-control, patience. It takes saying no to my flesh and saying yes to the Holy Spirit. Surrender. I love how the ESV version states the verse in 1 Peter. Instead of "commit themselves," it uses the verb entrust. We entrust ourselves to our Creator. The Psalms I read today all speak of looking to God, entrusting ourselves to God. It talks about how God listens when we cry and of His trustworthiness, and His faithfulness.

Recently my husband and I have been working on a mammoth project outside. We're clearing out a lot of brush, limbs of trees, ivy, blackberries. It is a hot, dirty, hard job. At first it was very difficult to be motivated to jump in and participate. As I've surrendered to the plan (entrusting my soul to my Creator...that sounds so lofty, so heroic) I have found peace, and I've found that God has provided me with strength to work until the boss says it's quittin' time. I have found that I even have joy in the middle of the sticks, stickers, and dirt. Joy!! It is dirty joy, but joy all the same. Psalms 116 and 146 so perfectly state what my heart encounters when I surrender. I have also found that as I've laid out my desires in ministry, I have peace, knowing that God will work out the details and the timing.

What does surrender look like in your life? What do you get in exchange for trusting God?

Whom do I worship?

Psalm 25:1
"To you, O Lord, I lift up my soul; in you I trust, O my God."

Psalm 55:16
"But I call to God, and the Lord saves. Evening, morning and noon I cry out in distress, and He hears my voice."

Psalm 85:8-9
"I will listen to what God the Lord will say; He promises peace to His people, HIs saints– but let them not return to folly. Surely His salvation is near those who fear Him, that His glory may dwell in our land."

Psalm 115:2-8
Why do the nations say, "Where is their God?" Our God is in heaven; He does whatever pleases Him. But their idols are silver and gold, made by the hands of men. They have mouths, but cannot speak, eyes, but they cannot see; they have ears, but cannot hear, noses, but they cannot smell; they have hands, but cannot feel; feet but they cannot walk; nor can they utter a sound with their throats. Those who make them will be like them, and so will all who trust in them."

Psalm 145:1-7, 18-21 (God leads us in true worship, recommend this whole Psalm)
"I will exalt You, my God the King; I will praise Your name forever and ever. Every day I will praise You and extol Your name forever and ever. Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; His greatness no one can fathom. One generation will commend Your works to another; they will tell of Your mighty acts. They will speak of the glorious splendor of Your majesty, and I will meditate on Your wonderful works. They will tell of the power of Your awesome works, and I will proclaim Your great deeds. They will celebrate Your abundant goodness and joyfully sing of Your righteousness."

"The Lord is near to all who call on Him, to all who call on Him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear Him; He hears their cry and saves them. The Lord watches over all who love Him, but all the wicked He will destroy. My mouth will speak in the praise of the Lord. Let every creature praise His holy name forever and ever."

These Psalms prompted me to look at what my heart is pondering the majority of the time, what am I worshipping. Lately, honestly, is the impact of the things I write. I find myself looking to the praises of man. That is the last thing that I ever intended when I began to write consistently. Yet, how easily do I go back to my folly. I am just so human. Pastor Ron, who is now singing praises with the angels and saints, used to say, "If salvation were up to us, we'd never make it." I'm thankful for verses like Ephesians 2:8-9 that tell me it is God's gift and it isn't dependent on anything I could do. It is totally out of my hands. HOWEVER, my heart is brought low when I consider how quickly I treasure things that don't save me, are made by men, cannot speak, cannot see, cannot smell, cannot feel, cannot walk. Which means, God CAN do all of those things, and He invites me to treasure Him; to be sustained, provided for, and brought near to Him! So today I set aside and make plans to treasure and worship my Savior. I set aside those things which are empty, and treasure instead, praise instead, worship instead, SPEAK ABOUT instead, my Savior. His nearness is my good, and according to those last few verses, He is near to all who call on Him. So I call on Him, the One who is worthy, the One who is able to answer.

Lord, I praise you and extol Your great works. I praise YOU that You never change in my ever changing self and world. Be Thou my vision and bind my wandering heart to Thee. I will speak about Your great works so that those around me will say of You, that You have saved me. It is You that has rescued me from harm. It is You that has provided to graciously and abundantly. It is beyond what I expect or deserve. Praise be to Your HOLY NAME. 

Cain and Abel

Genesis 4:1-16
"Now Adam knew Eve his wife, and she conceived and bore Cain, saying, 'I have gotten a man with the help of the Lord.' And again, she bore his brother Abel. Now Abel was a keeper of sheep, and Cain a worker of the ground. In the course of time Cain brought to the Lord an offering of the fruit of the ground, and Abel also brought of the firstborn of his flock and of their fat portions. And the Lord had regard for Abel and his offering, but for Cain and his offering he had no regard. So Cain was very angry, and his face fell. The Lord said to Cain, 'Why are you angry, and why has your face fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well sin is crouching at the door. Its desire is for you, but you must rule over it.'

Cain spoke to Abel his brother, and when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel and killed him. Then the Lord said to Cain, 'Where is Abel your brother?' He said, 'I do not know; am I my brother's keeper?' And the Lord said, 'What have you done? The voice of your brother's blood is crying to me from the ground. And now you are cursed from the ground, which has opened his mouth to receive your brother's blood from your hand. When you work the ground, it shall no longer yield to you its strength. You shall be a fugitive and a wanderer on the earth. Cain said to the Lord, 'My punishment is greater than I can bear. Behold, you have driven me today away from the ground, and from your face I shall be hidden. I shall be a fugitive and a wanderer on the earth, and whoever finds me will kill me.' Then the Lord said to him, 'Not so! If anyone kills Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold.' And the Lord put a mark on Cain, lest any who found him should attack him. Then Cain went away from the presence of the Lord and settled in the land of Nod, East of Eden."

Hebrews 11:1-4 (ESV)
"Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. For by it the people of old received their commendation. By faith we understand that the universe was created by the word of God, so that what is seen was not made out of things that are visible. By faith Abel offered to God a more acceptable sacrifice than Cain, through which he was commended as righteous, God commending him by accepting his gifts. And through his faith, though he died, he still speaks."

Sacrifice Day

The morning breaks on the day of sacrifice. Cain grumbles as his feet hit the floor. Another day of back breaking work. Cain rubs his eyes and looks at his tired feet sitting on the dirt floor. He remembers the events that took place yesterday and groans. He and Abel had gotten into another argument and just the thought of his brother's face and his protests angered Cain. He grunted and moved to get up and grab some food. Today he'd prepare what he thought was going to be enough for this God that his parents had once walked with. Cain didn't understand what the fuss was about. So many hours of the stories and he still didn't see the purpose for the sacrifice. He worked so hard day after day; breaking ground, tilling the soil, sowing, reaping, and storing away food and seed. He worked. So. Hard. And still this nameless God demanded sacrifice. Why? It just made Cain angry to have to give away his hard earned food to just be burned up. He didn't have time or energy for this. Not to mention, his little two-face brother was just as enamored with God as his parents were, and that angered Cain to no end. Abel was always looking for approval, and the trembling chin and tears as he talked about God did not move Cain. He saw right through the act. He knew that Abel was just trying to gain his parents approval. It pierced Cain's heart to think of the times when his parents talked in tender voices with Abel. Why didn't they notice him? He was the one who worked hard to provide for the family? It was him who was strong and able to provide! "This family is so deceived," he thought.

Later that day, as the family gathered for the time of sacrifice, the family brought various things to be burned on the alter. First Adam and Eve brought their lamb. They went through the ritual, bowed low to the ground, and repented of their brokenness that had broken trust with God. This brokenness which had separated them from communion and fellowship with their Maker, and which they could see in their children as well. They were reminded, once again, of what God had said, and the pain and the hope that mingled pierced their hearts.

Cain moved with stiffness as he went toward the alter with his meager basket of food. His heart mocked his family as they stepped back to make room for him to approach. His anger had subsided from earlier and now he just felt tired. As he stepped back from the alter, he bowed, but he didn't worship. He had worked hard for this fruit, and he wondered again why he had to give it up. He watched as the fire licked the fruit, waited for it to be burned to ash, then stepped back. Abel brushed past him and moved towards the alter with his lamb. Then he stopped. Cain couldn't see why he stopped, and was taken aback when Abel turned.

"Cain, I was angry at you yesterday at something that wasn't my business. I'm so sorry for the way I spoke to you. It has been on my heart all night and I cannot take another step before I ask your forgiveness. Will you forgive me?"

Cain mumbled yes, but his heart was far from forgiveness. In fact, it angered him that Abel would be so two-faced in front of the alter. He'd have words with him later.

As Abel stepped forward to the alter with his bleating lamb, he started sobbing. Abel had raised this lamb with his own hands, and had cared for it when it had been separated from it's mama. He spent so many hours tending his flock he thought his soul was being ripped out of his body.

Abel had spent many hours with his parents talking about the time when they had walked in a garden, when life had been so, so different. Abel knew this God that they had walked with. He could see HIs hand all over the trees, the grasses, the plants, the newborn lambs, the soft wool. He recognized the immensity of creation, and therefore the immensity of Creator God. He said words of thanks often as he glanced around at his surroundings. He said words of thanks when he looked at his previous lambs. Their need for a protector and provider softened his heart towards them, and he cared for them with such a tender heart. To now chance to offer him to Creator God, to have to sacrifice this innocent precious babe because of the broken in him, pierced him. He wanted to run screaming from the alter and never return. But he did it. He wanted to fulfill what was asked because Creator God required it. The greatness and the wildness of God was worth the hurt inside.

As Abel sacrificed his lamb with great sobs, Cain looked on, mocking him in his mind. How could Abel offer his precious little lambs so freely. How could he believe? How could a God require such a sacrifice? And what did it get him? Cain certainly was too filled with resentment and bitterness to see the point. He stayed just as long as was required, than returned to the fields to keep working. His anger subsided, but the questions lingered in his mind...if he ever got the chance to rid the world of his weakling of a brother Abel, what would he do?

Who is this King of Glory?

Psalm 24:1-4, 7-10 (I recommend reading this whole Psalm, and Psalm 91, to have a better understanding of God's name, Lord Almighty.)
"The earth is the Lord's, and everything in it, the world, and all who live in it; for He founded it upon the seas and established it upon the waters. Who may ascend the hill of the Lord? Who may stand in His holy place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart, who does not lift up his soul to an idol or swear by what is false."

"Lift up your herds, O you gates; be lifted up, you ancient doors, that the King of glory may come in. Who is this King of glory? The Lord strong and mighty, the Lord mighty in battle. Lift up your heads, O you gates; lift them up, you ancient doors, that the King of glory may com in. Who is He, this King of glory? The Lord Almighty– He is the King of Glory. Selah

Psalm 84:1, 4
"Save me, O God, by your name; vindicate me by your might. Hear my prayer, O God; listen to the words of my mouth."

"Surely God is my help; the Lord is the One who sustains me."

Psalm 84:1-2, 11-12
"How lovely is your dwelling place, O Lord Almighty! My soul years, even faints, for the courts of the Lord; my heart and my flesh cry out for the living God."

"For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor; no good thing does He withhold from those whose walk is blameless. O Lord Almighty, blessed is the man who trusts in you."

Psalm 114:7-8
"Tremble, O earth, at the presence of the Lord, and the presence of the God of Jacob, who turned the rock into a pool, the hard rock into springs of water."

Psalm 144:2, 15 (I recommend reading the whole Psalm!)
"He is my loving God and my fortress, my stronghold and my deliverer, my shield in whom I take refuge, who subdues peoples (this is King David, King of Israel speaking...for us, thoughts, spiritual enemies?) under me."

"Blessed are the people of whom this (see previous verses) is true; blessed are the people whose God is the Lord."

In light of who God is, Almighty God, sustainer, provider, protector, stronger than any other...I bend my knee. I submit my circumstances and momentary trials to Him. "I consider that our present sufferings (persecution, beatings, imprisonment) are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. (Romans 8:18)" If Paul considers these trials, I have not encountered trials. I have encountered "bumps" along the way. I've encountered things that are different than my expectations. I have encountered so little because my walk of faith isn't really a walk of faith. It is weak. It is a walk by sight. If God is who He says He is, let my feet walk by faith and not by sight.

God, what are you asking me to do? How are you asking me to trust who you are? In light of you being El Shaddai, God Almighty, where would you have me go and what would you have me do? Let my life be a reflection of who you are! Let my life say of you, "God is who He says He is!" God lead me in confession, in submission to you. Lead me. My life is yours. Help me to understand deeper, and my life reflect, who you are, the King of Glory, God Almighty. Praise your Name for inviting us to know who you are. Praise your Name for not only showing us in your Word, but showing us in our very lives, in our present time and hearts, who you are. Praise your Name, King of Glory, God Almighty!

In whom do I put my hope?

Psalm 23:1-3
"The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, He leads me beside quiet waters, He restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for His name's sake. Even thought I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever."

Psalm 53:5
"There they were (those who say, "there is no God."), overwhelmed with dread, where there was nothing to dread."

Psalm 83:18
"Let them (our enemies) know that you, whose name is the Lord–that You alone are the Most High over all the earth."

Psalm 113:4-9
"Who is like he Lord our God, the One who sits enthroned on high, who stoops down to look on the heavens and the earth? He raises the poor from the dust and lifts the needy from the ash heap; He seats them with princes, with the princes of their people. He settles the barren woman in her home as a happy mother of children. Praise the Lord."

Ps. 143:8
"Let the morning bring me word of you unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul."

As I consider my day and the busy plans we have made, I can easily get overwhelmed. However, I don't put my trust in my own strength to get through the day unscathed. How little I really control...and in the end, the question that stands is, whom or what do I worship? As I read these Psalms I'm reminded that as I worship God (fix my mind on His promises instead of trying to control my circumstances, dancing in worship instead of moving from this or that thing in desperate attempts to control something, anything; being still in my thoughts as I, again, fix them on God's truth), He stills my mind and speaks softly of His love (the cross, His word), His grace (all that I see around me), His mercy; and I drink in His peace. All the while, the kids need to be taken care of, the paper mess corralled, the dishes done, the laundry washed, the weeds picked, the kids picked up from school, the babies bottled and changed, the concert attended, horn played, etc. My eyes are fixed on Jesus, who knows and understands that craziness. And I run the race marked. out. for. ME. And I "consider Him who endured such opposition from sinful men so that [I would] not grow weary and lose heart. (Hebrews 12:1-2,3) I place my hope of ever coming through today with peace, in my Shepherd, My Savior, and the One who endured the cross so that I could grab His hand and run. Looking to Him today.

Where are you placing your hope? What are you fixing your "eyes" onto? What promises are you dwelling on today?

These truths have such huge impact, not only for the crazy days, but for the truly hard times, and for those times we consider the truly dramatic and traumatic things going on in our world today. God, YOU are our only hope.

Do I trust God?

Psalm 22

“My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, so far from the words of my groaning? O God I cry out by day but you do not answer, by night, and am not silent." "Yet, you are enthroned in heaven as the Holy One…”

The precious words of Christ. While the wrath of the Father was being poured out on Him, as He carried the sins of the world on His shoulders. He walked to the cross trusting the power of God. Never doubted. Never wondered like I do. God proved Himself to be trustworthy because Christ rose again. He came back to life. Yet His soul, my soul, cries out. Do I really entrust myself to God? While I'm NOT in the thick of the hard thing...yes. While I'm in the thick of the hard thing and my emotions are high and there's tension, t's harder to stand with strength and say that same yes. HOWEVER, God is enthroned in heaven as the Holy One. No matter what is going on in life, His character remains, His holy intentions are the same. Regardless of my emotions, He is who He is.

How are you entrusting yourself and your circumstances to God, as Christ did?

You Know Me

Psalm 21

"O Lord, the king rejoices in your strength.
How great is his joy in the victories you give!
You have granted him the desire of his heart
and have not withheld the request of his lips.
Selah"

Close. Tight. I know Him, and He knows me. We have gone to battle together. We've had adventures together. I know His strength and rejoice in it. He knows the desires of my heart and has seen fit to give them to me. He has heard my request. I have the freedom to ask, and He has not withheld them from me.

"Surely you have granted him eternal blessings and made him glad with the joy of your presence. For the king trusts in the Lord through...through the unfailing love of the Most High he will not be shaken."

Presence. God's presence with me. He calls me to trust Him. I trust. He always keeps his promises and continually, continually, continually confirms His faithfulness to me. Because of God's unfailing love I WILL. NOT. BE. SHAKEN. (James 1:5-7) He calls me to ask. (John 16:24) He invites me to be close enough to ask without hesitation. To ask, because He is...faithful in His love.

"Be exalted, O Lord, in your strength; we will sing and praise your might."

Psalm 51
Confession. He presses in, convicts, leads me in confession.

"Surely you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place."

He invites me to be honest with myself and with Him. Then I ask..cleanse me, for You are holy, I am not, and this thing that stands between us causes us pain.

"Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow. Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones you have crushed rejoice. Hide your face from my sins and blot out all my iniquity. Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."

And He does. (1 John 1:9)

And then we go deliver...

"Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will turn back to you."

And then, here's the thing. Here is what allows the closeness that God desires and my soul thirsts for...

"You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it; you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you do not despise."

(What does a humble heart look like? This resounds in my heart when I'm tempted to revel in a deed, a thought...Philippians 2:6, Who, being in the very nature God, [Jesus] did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made Himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant...")

Psalm 91
Almighty God. El Shaddai. Powerful protector, loving provider.
"If you make the Most High your dwelling–even the Lord, who is my refuge–then no harm will befall you, no disaster will come near your tent. For He will command His angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone." (v.14) 'Because he loves me,' says the Lord, 'I will rescue him. I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life will I satisfy him and show him my salvation.'"

Again. Closeness. Relationship. I trust Him because He is faithful. He protects, provides, because we share a love and closeness. We are family. We are family with NOTHING between us. No judgement. No condemnation. No lies. No hidden agendas. No deception. Only truth. Only love. Because of His mercy on us and our sin. Because of His good favor towards us. Because we love Him. Because we trust Him. He provides protection and salvation. But only because of Jesus (Romans 5:8).

Psalm 141
v. 1-2 "O Lord, I call to you; come quickly to me. Hear my voice when I call to you. May my prayer be set before you like incense; may the lifting up of my hands be like the evening sacrifice."

Again. Closeness. If God is faithful, my first response will be to call out. "Father!" He will hear. My voice calling will be like incense. It will be a sweet sound, just like the sound of my own children are sweet in my ear. My hands raised will be like an evening sacrifice. It will be a cherished thing to my Abba Father.

v.3-5b Lord, you know my thoughts and words (Psalm 139). "Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips. Let not my heart be drawn to what is evil, to take part in wicked deeds with men who are evildoers..." Discipline me, Lord. Keep my feet in step with yours!

God's presence. He invites us to be close. He invites us to trust. He invites us to trust His character and find Him lacking in nothing. He invites us to set down our sin, the things our heart worships other than Him. John 8:11 "Go now and leave your life of sin." When we do, we are called the children of God. Our Father, El Shaddai, is the perfect Father.

Psalm 20, 50, 90, 140

To God be the glory

let all creation cry

Praise and honor to Christ,

Word of God, Word of life.

 (My Soul Longs for the Lord-Getty)

Ps. 20

Our God is mighty. He saves with the power of His right hand those He has anointed (believers in Jesus and those He is bringing near to Him.) We trust in the Name of the Lord our God, because He is trustworthy. He does not disappoint. We rise up and stand firm. When we celebrate victory, we will shout for Joy and declare glory to God, for it is He in whom we have placed our trust. It is He who has given us the victory!

What does this look like in my day? Month? Year? I don’t go to a literal battle…yet I do everyday. I go to battle against the messages and thoughts that cause me to fear the future, that would cause me to feel alone, that cause me to covet, etc. I trust not in my own wisdom or strength, but in the promises of our God who saves. I trust in His Word as truth, for it is like pure gold and sweeter than honey to my soul. His Word says that every good thing comes from the Father of Lights (James 1) and that He is working everything together for my good (Romans 8) and that nothing can separate me from His love (Romans 8). I can rest assured that everything that God asks me walk through is good and will produce perseverance (James 1). As I place my trust in Him and remember His many promises to hear my cry (help, Lord!), He fills me with hope and joy.

Ps. 50

Harsh. God knows the intents and motives of the heart. You say one thing, but you do another. V. 16 But to the wicked, God says: “What right have you to recite my laws or take my covenant on your lips? You hate my instruction and cast my words behind you.” You join in with those who are wicked, you use your mouth to speak against others and to slander them. You thought God was lawless. God will not stand for this.

“He who sacrifices thank offerings honors me, and He prepares the way so that I may show him the salvation of God.”

When I read this, it causes me to immediately examine my ways. Do I recite God’s word and then turn around and speak unkindly? What does that mean? The messages of the world, the religious words and patterns, are engrained in me. So, yes. When I agree with the ways of the world and act on it, when I speak against those around me and slander them (even in my mind), I’m walking as those to which God refers. What is the antidote to this? The last verse. It takes humbleness to truly be thankful, TO EVEN NOTICE what God has done. We know that God speaks about pride in His word. James 4:7-12. Thank you, Lord for so quickly giving us a way of escape for our very natural response, our automatic response sometimes, and for your grace and Holy Spirit which works in us to elicit a different kind of response. A response which gives life to us and keeps us close to you, and protects us. You know, Lord, that one day we will stand before YOU. You have that day in mind and you are very purposefully bringing the humble closer to purity with that day in mind. You are worthy of praise!

Ps. 90

Praise! “Lord, YOU have been our dwelling place throughout all generations. Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the earth and the world, from everlasting to everlasting, YOU are God.” God is the beginning, was at the beginning, is the creator and sustainer of all things. He sees generation after generation.

The weight of days. The weight of everyday. I feel this weight. I feel the weight of day after day. The same things day after day. Because we fear God, “Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.”

When I read about my sin, about salvation, about God’s wrath…I see Jesus on the cross, taking my sin, taking God’s wrath, and gratitude fills my heart. Praise is on my lips. Because of Jesus, I will not be subject to God’s wrath. I full accept His discipline because by it I know I am loved (Hebrews, James), but I know that Jesus took God’s wrath on His shoulders so that I would not have to.

The weight of days…”Satisfy us in the morning with your unfailing love, that we may sing fro joy and be glad all our days.” “May your deeds be shown to your servants, your splendor to their children. May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands for us–yes, establish the work of our hands.” It all points back to God and His grace as He works in the details of our lives. If I see myself and my wisdom working out the details, whom do I have to praise at the end of the day. Me? My wisdom? My strength? “In the last days men will be lovers of themselves (2 Tim 3). That certainly has been a natural way of my mind and heart, but now that I see that, it is like dust in my mouth. It chokes, it suffocates, and I run from it. God is at work in the details, I seek His wisdom, and at the end of the day I have Him to praise and worship. And it is He that establishes the work of my hands. I have direction and purpose. I praise His love and faithfulness! I am seen and known by Almighty God, and His wisdom and strength worked out the details of my life and He deserves all of my praise and worship. I give it, and am filled with joy!

Ps. 140

Rescue me, O Lord, from evil men; protect me from men of violence, who devise evil plans in their hearts and stir up war every day.” This isn’t a physical thing in my very comfortable life in the US. It just isn’t a thing. I know there are places in the US where this is a thing. I know there are people who struggle with enemies. I do not have any. I have thoughts that I need to be more vocal about my stand with Christ. For now, I know that I have an enemy who devises evil plans against me. (Romans 8) Our struggle isn’t against flesh and blood…

V. 6 is the cry of my heart against those plans that are devised. My head turns, my eyes lock with Jesus, and I am saved. I am saved though, all the while, even while my head is turned away. The words in v. 6…I say, I cry. Words. Out loud. I declare that it is God who hears, God who shows mercy. He is my strong deliverer. He comes when I cry. I love that I have a prayer against those who devise evil against me. God is just. God works and will fight on our behalf, we need only be still. (Ex 14:13-14).